21 Ways To Do Absolutely Nothing...
…And why its imperative that you do so!
Something needs my attention every single minute and I am spent.
Drained. Burned out. Life had just exceeded my ability to maintain cohesion with the space/time continuum. I had reached a point of physical and emotional depletion. Something dramatic needed to be done. So I elected to perform a positively hedonistic maneuver: I decided to stop everything and Do Nothing. As in do nothing that I should do. The intent was to just do plenty of “nothing” that I, selfishly, wanted to do. Right now. Not next month, next summer. Now, today. And it’s a thing. In Italian, the concept is dolce far niente --- the sweet doing nothing.
A golden opportunity had arisen. My husband was scheduled to be out of town for two weeks. Normally, I would not want to use up my paid vacation days if I was not actually… well, going on a vacation. But I yearned for alone time, quietness, and no demands, so I took a week off from work to spend time with myself, at my own quiet home. A week and two weekends of nothing.
“Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes, including you. Anne LaMott
With the exception of my Kindle, of which I am enormously fond, I am one of the least technologically-attached persons I know. I spent 9 days at home, alone, and no television viewing occurred. I have no Alexa, no streaming services----only an iPhone that is used for approximately 10 minutes per day to check e-mails, and 20 minutes to check my Facebook feed. A FB feed which mostly consists of photos/videos of cute puppies, friends with kids or grandkids, artists creating beauty from nothingness, bucket- list travel scenes from Paris and Lake Como. No drama is my motto. If your FB posts are divisive and argumentative, you will be “snoozed”. Repeatedly.
During my sabbatical, I purposely refused to watch the news. I intentionally unplugged from the negative, skewed, sensationalized propaganda that is the typical network newscast. I wanted to be free of the anxiety that it promotes. Unrelenting media bombardment about wars, rumors of wars, mass shootings, pandemics, climate calamities, racial unrest, cultural unrest, corruption, crime, etcetera becomes an overwhelming source of agitation. And I don’t think I’m the only one who needs to take a step back. Unplugging ---not just technologically ---is desperately needed in our world. I believe all of us can benefit from exiting the scrum long enough to regain our equilibrium, become refreshed, and get re-booted.
Yes, unplugging can be hard to do. Perhaps it’s a function of my Puritan background, but the idea of using up vacation time for the purpose of doing nothing is shocking. As in getting paid… yet doing nothing, “accomplishing” nothing. I used to see pictures of folks reading a book poolside on a cruise ship, or in a lounge chair on the French Riviera. Or simply lying in the sun or --- gasp! --- actually taking a nap. “How could you waste money like that???” ran the judgmental script in my head. “You have spent big bucks to get on an airplane and stay in a fancy hotel and you’re not doing anything. Go take a museum tour or something!” And yet they were doing something worthwhile: unplugging and enjoying the moment. Sometimes not doing something is doing something. An important, necessary something we all need.
The Dolce Far Niente
So after I reconciled myself to the foreign concept of Purposefully Doing Nothing, I allowed myself to think of things that would make me feel happy. I decided to spend my time in a way that pleased me--- even if it was not in the way that might be meaningful for someone else.
Here are some of the ways I amused myself:
I loaded up my Kindle with $1.99 books from the “Kindle Daily Deals” tab. Mostly sci-fi and historical fiction. Having a supply of unread novels living in my Kindle library is delicious ---like having a secret stash of dark chocolate non pareils in my pantry.
I stood in front of my mirror and practiced making ponytails for the summer. A hair stylist I am not.
I moved picture frames and knick-knacks from one place to the other around the house… because they just look so much better there than the last place I had them.
I pasted stickers in my journal. (For decoration and symbolism purposes.) I felt like I was in 2nd grade.
I wrote in my fancy journal with my new fountain pen.
I wrote notes for this blog, and collected other quotes and aphorisms to go on file for my next topic.
I drank lots of coffee (Starbucks Sumatra ---yes, I’ve been assimilated into the collective) and worked the NY Times crossword puzzle. Worked it in ink and, for the first time, finished with no mistakes!
I shopped online and ordered handmade scented soap and shampoo from my favorite purveyor.
I took my 87-year-old dad to lunch and visited with him at his home.
I talked on the telephone with my daughter and traded funny memes and texts about books we’re reading. (Why do folks on the run from assassins --- with day after day of unrelenting pursuit, all sweaty and dirty with no time for hot showers or tooth brushing --- suddenly decide, right there in the middle of their frantic escape, that the time is NOW, right now, for a romantic interlude??)
I read books. For as long as I wanted to. With more coffee and those scrumptious cinnamon mini cake doughnuts.
I reviewed recipes I’ve been wanting to try and cooked one of them.
I surfed the Internet for places I wanted to go on my “real” vacation.
I cleaned out closets and found all my 1980’s gloriousness --- padded shoulders, peplum -waist skirt sets, and Michael Jackson-ish military design pant suits. Did I really wear that size??? How did that dress with the giant print flowers and fruit not make me look like an upholstered sofa? (Or, cringe, maybe it did??)
I sorted through old photos. I took photos of photos and texted them to friends and family that would enjoy them.
I emptied out dresser drawers and found “lost” things like my hippy fringed suede drawstring purse from 1969 and my mom’s class ring.
I measured our home’s closet space in order to prove myself right in the recurring wife vs. husband argument over who was using more space. (I am victorious: Hubby = 64%, Wife = 36%. My husband does have a legit sartorial flair, but the main component in his hoggishness of our home’s available closet space is his ever-expanding collection of tee shirts, sweat shirts, and hoodies from Every Single Football Game he has ever attended.)
I got a pedicure. Sparkly magenta, my favorite.
I took myself out to lunch and for a leisurely stroll through Barnes & Noble. Touched about 100 books and lusted after all the beautiful embossed journals and note cards.
I went to bed when I felt like it. Got up when I felt like it …or at least when my puppy dog decided it was time to arise …and stepped on my boob as he tried to lovingly snuffle in my ear. Boob stomping tends to wake one up.
I purged and re-arranged the pantry. (Why do we have 9 bottles of balsamic vinegar??) (Yes, we still have a sufficient supply of Spam in case of a hurricane.) (I need to replenish my supply of Nestle’s Quik!)
In reality, many, if not all, of these activities might take place in any given month, but the specialness of being able to do them on my own timetable, for as long as I wanted,when I wanted, was part of the peacefulness factor. No rushing, no feeling guilty at the time spent on Nothing Important, no need to interact with anyone or take someone else’s preferences into consideration--- these were all factors in the happiness of the endeavor. I found great joy.
Even Jesus rested.
Many of us are aware that Jesus routinely stepped away from daily duties to go pray. But there is another reason to step away. In the Bible’s book of Mark we find the disciples gathering around Jesus to report to Him all they’d done and taught. There were so many people coming and going around them the disciples did not even have a chance to eat. They had been working and ministering to others so much that they were weary and had not had even a minute to receive necessary sustenance. Jesus said “ ‘Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.’ So they went away by themselves in a boat to a solitary place.” Mark 6: 30-32. It is not recorded that Jesus told them to study or pray or do anything “useful.” He told them to go by themselves to a quiet place and rest. If the advice was good enough for the Lord’s disciples, it’s good enough for me.
The airline industry’s instruction of first donning the oxygen mask yourself before attempting to help someone else with their mask applies. There are times where we ourselves have to be refreshed before we can minister to others. I submit, therefore, that it is a perfectly legitimate goal to allot some time to take a step back and separate from the world. For therapeutic purposes. So go enjoy God’s creation and cultivate your own personal specialness. Rest. Jesus told us to.
Application:
When was the last time you truly rested?
What can you do to “come away to a quiet place and get some rest”?
What are ways you can think of to enjoy yourself?